Why You Need to Hit Pause SometimesMarch 16, 2021
Hit pause every day for at least fifteen minutes will help you physically, mentally and emotionally.
Hitting the pause button in life will be hard, especially as a parent. There are so many things demanding your “immediate” attention… but exactly what and who should get that attention at that very moment? Time to hit snooze and pause everything for a minute to regroup.
Nothing can be more special than becoming a parent, especially a mother. You wait for those tough but beautiful nine months to have the first glance of your baby.
But, all of a sudden, after that moment, life completely changes for you. Mostly, the lifestyle of a working woman gets hindered due to the entry of a new member into her life. Not just anyone, but her child, someone whom she is 100% responsible for.
This hindrance leads to several sacrifices and tough decisions like quitting the job, adjusting to a new lifestyle, sacrificing the dreams, etc. But, before getting much deeper into this, let’s discuss what motherhood demands from a woman?
Demands Of Motherhood
As we were discussing, becoming a mother needs a lot of sacrifices and adjustments to make. But, what are the situations a mother goes through after giving birth to her baby?
Taking Care of the Newborn
A mother is never free of duty until her baby turns into an adult. The beginning of motherhood is much more hectic for a mother. Starting from feeding to peeing, everything is now a mother’s responsibility. She has to learn how to feed her child, how to give them proper nutrition, when to feed them, how much, then they must move on to teach their child life skills, and more. It gets exhausting with the day in and day out with the amount of work she must do.
And we all are aware of the other things a newborn does during the initial few months. This responsibility on a mother forces her to change her routine completely. It disturbs her sleep cycle, work cycle, and most importantly, increases the mental pressure.
The first six months are a very trying time for mom. Every 1.5 to 2 hours she is having to feed or change baby, she gets her sleep in two hour intervals much of that time.
Handling All Social Relations
A woman is a mother, wife, friend, worker, etc. She plays several important roles in our life. But, different roles also bring different responsibilities, and fulfilling these responsibilities perfectly is not possible for a single individual. This creates an unsustainable mental load in a woman’s head.
Are you hitting pause to be social with yourself?
Motherhood Can Set Limits in a Woman’s Life
No one loves to limit their lifestyle. Everyone always dreams of being independent and limitless. But not with the mother! Motherhood adds several limits to life.
For example, the summer trip will be decided based on kids’ or husbands’ leave, or taking a break from household duties and hanging around freely is not always possible.
Mom will have to create a time and space in her calendar just to get her nails and hair done, this is limiting for her self care.
Motherhood Demands Sacrifices
We always talk about a mother’s sacrifice, but what are the sacrifices they make in reality? In this progressive world, having a baby and fulfilling dreams is still a difficult task for a woman.
This requires the sacrifice of dreams or jobs. Hanging out and chilling around with the partner will never be the same. Now, it will be her baby, that will be everything for her, and she will sacrifice all her desires and interests for the betterment of her baby.
There are a lot more demands a mother faces during her whole journey. But, the only concerning thing is its consequences. What are the consequences a mother faces with all these demands on her head?
Consequences Of Demands
It’s not only about a mother, but whoever is loaded with a bucket full of responsibilities, then he/she will face some sort of negative consequences too. And this is the reason why almost every mother faces these consequences at some point during her motherhood.
- With all the responsibilities on her shoulder, a mother tries to convince herself that she needs to be a wonder woman if she wants to impress everyone. This further increases more stress.
- A newly become mother always wants to enjoy the journey of motherhood. With all the responsibilities and expectations, the journey turns into a burden as we can exceed our physical limits.
- The most important consequence is that they start self-doubting. Whatever they do to impress others, they will always doubt them. They will feel like whatever is happening is just because of them.
So, what’s the solution to all these burdens, demands, or consequences? Is it a truth that a mother can not enjoy her freedom? No, it’s not the truth.
A mother can enjoy her life as well, and she does require a pause. She is not a robot that can function for the whole year. Let’s discuss how ‘pausing” can help to find balance in motherhood?
Pausing In Motherhood
What’s the definition of a pause in motherhood? Whether a new mother or a mother of a 10 years kid, the pause is a natural requirement in a mother’s life.
Until a mother is doing her job with her emotions, she does that in autopilot mode. But, she feels she is not physically able to do so, and it feels like a burden to her, which means she requires a pause now to balance herself again.
A pause does not mean a huge period, but even a small but effective pause can be great for a mother. If you are confused with small pauses, then here is an example for you.
If you are hanging out with your kids but are not enjoying it due to the day’s hectic schedule, this will be seen on your face. So, just take a small pause, breath in and out quite a few times, and you will be back again.
This pausing will be a key factor for balancing motherhood. With a full hectic day of parenting and non-parenting duties, you will be spread too thin and will not be able to do that continuously. This situation demands an instant pause to balance her motherhood.
But, there are several other instances too that require a huge shift of pause. A pause away from everyone around or a pause with the family only. This pause will mean taking out time for herself as well as for the family. By taking this required pause will recharge their batteries, refresh their minds, and add positive thoughts and self-confidence in them again.
But, what can a mother do to take time for herself to restore her energy and patience?
What Are Different Ways To Find Time For A Mother?
Finding time to take a magical pause in the continuous schedule of a mother is difficult.
Get out your calendar, view the last three months. What day and what times did you have not scheduled to do something? Now choose a day and time to create a daily event on your calendar that will lock in your non negotiable “time for pause”. Fifteen minutes is all you need to help yourself regroup so you can carry on with your day.
need an immediate pause because the kids have “gone too far”… Open the window, look out at the clouds, then close your eyes and breathe in and out five times. open your eyes and enjoy another minute of the fresh new look you have then go ahead and deal with life.
Multitasking With Kids
Dealing with babies and toddlers is not easy, as they can not do tasks on their own. So, they require a constant person at their side to assist them.
But, an older kid can do some tasks if they were taught that way. So, if a kid is having lunch, then the mom can wash dishes at that time. With this multitasking, she can save time. This also allows mom to have a pause from doing things for their child. So begin teaching them how to do things early on, yes even at age two, they can learn to do some things already.
Adjusting Sleeping Schedule
Mothers should adjust their sleeping schedule as per the kid’s sleeping schedule. Kids have a habit of taking a long nap. So if the mother manages to wake up an hour before the baby wakes up, then that time she can spend on herself. This will be a great opportunity for that pause you absolutely need.
Cook Time-Saving Meals
If you follow recipe books, you will find many dishes that can be cooked with minimum preparation. Use appliances that will help make your life easier and tasks using less of your time. You can use that saved up time for your pause.
Have A Change In Career
Don’t want to quit the job even after a baby? Then opt for a job that will suit your schedule. Mother’s can opt for part-time jobs, a few days a week jobs, or work from home jobs to save time for themselves as well as for the baby. This will greatly benefit ambitious mothers.
Have Some Time With Nature
Take your pause in nature, even if you are with your kids, itwill enhance the relationship with your kids. The interaction with nature will keep you calm and composed and fill your mind with peace as well.
Take a slow look all around you. Close your eyes and just listen for a while. What do you hear? Feel around, what do you feel? Sniff, what do you smell? Open your eyes, what do you see? How does the whole experience make you feel?
Do Exercises With A Schedule
Take time to have a regular workout session to keep yourself fit and energetic for the rest of the day.
If possible, involve your kids and keep them involved with you to manage and spend time with them. If you can’t get alone time to do them by yourself, opt for exercises with fun like exercise balls, jump ropes, dance workout, etc. This will help to have a balance in motherhood.
Connect With Other Mothers In Neighborhood
Connecting to nearby friends will allow you to gossip and spend some quality time. Also, this meet will allow your kids to interact with other kids and will help them to have a fun time as well.
Go on a Trip
Who hates going on a vacation? No one, right? Planning a vacation trip will help you to have a huge pause and will recharge your batteries fully. Also, exploring new places with family is always a good experience to have a balance in motherhood. This is a great way to have strong bonds with the kids.
Always try to find a way to take out time. If you cannot do so, ask your other near and dear ones to assist you. No matter how long the trip is, even a day trip will give you that pause you need.
A Daily Pause is Exactly What You Need
By now, you might have got the answer to Why “pausing” is key to finding balance in motherhood. Right? Taking out time for yourself is never a matter of guilt. Always feel free to take a pause. This will not only balance motherhood but also help you to grow.
Pausing is always a demand from a mother’s side, but they will never express that. But, to assure all mothers, pausing will have a positive impact upon you.